THE HORROR

“I’ve seen horrors,
horrors that you’ve seen.
But you have no right to call me a murderer.
You have a right to kill me.
You have a right to do that.
But you have no right to judge me.

It’s impossible for words
to describe
what is necessary,
to those
who do not know
what horror means.

Horror.

Horror has a face.
And you must make a friend of horror.
Horror and moral terror
are your friends.
If they are not
then they are enemies to be feared.
They are truly enemies.

I remember when I was with Special Forces
-seems a thousand centuries ago-.
We went into a camp to inoculate
some children.
We’d left the camp
After we had inoculated the children for polio.
And this old man came running after us,
and he was crying.
He couldn’t say.
We went back there;
and they had come and hacked off
every inoculated arm.

There they were, in a pile…
a pile of
little arms.

And I remember…
I… I… I cried…
I wept like…
some grandmother.
I wanted to tear my teeth out.
I didn’t know what I wanted to do.
And I want to remember it.
I never want to forget it.
I never want to forget.
And then I realized
like I was shot
like I was shot with a diamond…
a diamond bullet right through my forehead.
And I thought:
‘My God, the genius of that.
The genius.
The will to do that.
Perfect,
genuine,
complete,
crystalline,
pure.’
And then I realized
they were stronger than me because they could stand it.
These were not monsters.
These were men,
trained cadres.
These men who fought with their hearts,
who have families,
who have children,
who are filled with love
that they have the strength…
the strength
to do that.

If I had ten divisions of those men
then our troubles here would be over very quickly.

You have to have men
who are moral
and at the same time
who are able to
utilize their
primordial instincts to kill
without feeling,
without passion…

without judgment… without judgment…

Because it’s judgment that defeats us.”

Monólogo final de Kurtz en ‘Apocalypse Now’; guión escrito por John Milius y Francis Ford Coppola

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